The Skolney Blog

1992: I didn't see Juice in theaters. It was that fall. I actually have a kind of vivid memory of getting it one afternoon on pay per view. I don't recall what my awareness was of this at that point. But I do know that by this point I had seen films like Boyz N The Hood and New Jack City, so I was very much into that era of black film already. Juice fit right in. This is a fucking classic from the very start. It has one of the all time opening credits, backed by "Juice (Know The Ledge)" by Eric B. and Rakim, one of the best rap songs ever. We're in.  Juice is probably most known 30 years later for two things. One is the soundtrack, which is just one classic after another. One of the all time best. The other is the acting debut of Tupac Shakur. Tupac is simply amazing in this. It's not an easy part, as you have to believe his character would go off the deep end the way he does or otherwise the story just doesn't work. Juice is actually kind of just a fr...

AFC: BENGALS 27, CHIEFS 24 OT Like every other soul on earth, at 21-3 I thought this game was over. Patrick Mahomes was in classic cheat code mode. The Bengals were no match on offense. The only matter to be determined was how big a rout it would be. Even when Cincy broke off a TD run late in the 2nd quarter it didn't feel like it mattered. Even when the Chiefs passed on a field goal and went for the TD on the final play before halftime and failed it didn't seem like a big deal. Only the clock had stopped the juggernaut Chiefs at that point. But in one of the all time halftime adjustments that I have certainly ever seen, the 2nd half Bengals defense turned Mahomes into Christian Ponder. KC could no longer move the ball. Mahomes looked rattled, and ran around for nothing just like in last year's super bowl. It wasn't as if Joe Burrow suddenly got hot either. He was okay, but he had a whole half to make up an 11 point deficit. And they got the one big turnover they needed...

In theaters: A JOURNAL FOR JORDAN I don't really get why a movie starring Michael B. Jordan and directed by Denzel Washington didn't get more attention upon its release. It's really good though, a film that manages to be both sentimental and not sappy. Jordan is of course terrific, but his co-star Chante Adams really owns this movie. If they had star-making performances anymore, hers would be one.  THE TRAGEDY OF MACBETH An interesting experiment. Joel Coen's 1st film all on his own is a very faithful adaptation. The dialogue is often hard to decipher if you don't already know the Macbeth tale. You can still appreciate the stellar Denzel Washington performance. And the set design and photography are just awesome to look at. If they had films in the 1600s I feel like this is what they would have looked like.  THE 355 A solid stab at doing an action spy thriller with an all female main cast. Jessica Chastain, Penelope Cruz, Lupita N'yongo and Diane Kruger are all ...

Saturday: BENGALS 19, TITANS 16 The next time the Titans are in position to be a #1 seed they need to tank. I picked the Bengals for this very reason. The visitors weren't amazing, in a game where both OLs were garbage (9 sacks on Burrow), but were able to hit a couple more big plays, and their QB didn't throw 3 interceptions, including that absolute dagger right at the end. I think this is where it ends for Cincy, although they seem way more legit than the Browns did last year. As for the Titans, they probably overachieved a little. The Chiefs and Bills respective slumps kind of handed them the 1 seed.  49ERS 13, PACKERS 10 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I never thought the 49ers were going to win this game until the final kick was splitting the uprights. The game started so badly that I wasn't sure I would even make it til halftime. Green Bay went right down the field for a TD. The 49ers offense wasn't doing a thing. But then their defense (led by maybe ...

1. She would make the team Stronger. 2. The locker room definitely would not be Toxic.  3. A cursed franchise would immediately become a lot more Lucky.  4. She would always make sure the players put in their Work Bitch. 5. We would not win Everytime, but we would definitely win Sometimes 6. She would obviously lead the team to Glory. Bonus reason: All the tackling dummies would look like Jamie. 

Screams 1 and 2 are sacred texts. They remain way up on my list of all time favorite movies. They were enormously influential towards my own creativity in that time. I could not hold them in higher regard. Scream 3 is the runt of the franchise. Scream 4 was, I thought, a very underappreciated comeback for the franchise. Which brings us to Scream 5, which, for some reason is just called Scream, because we can't subtitle or number sequels anymore like normal people. See also Halloween, Shaft, Charlie's Angels, etc. But for now and for always, this thing will be Scream 5 to me.  And...it's really fucking good. Not 1 and 2 good, but probably even better than 4 good. I will see this again, but after 1 viewing I would place it above 4 because it feels a little tighter and more focused.  This is the 1st film in the franchise to not be directed by Wes Craven, and Kevin Williamson neither wrote this (as in 1, 2 and 4) nor outlined the story (as in 3). You really wouldn't know it...

Saturday: BENGALS 26, RAIDERS 19 I don't even know how this game managed to come down to a 4th down play at the goal line. Watching the game the Bengals were clearly the far better team. Joe Burrow was lights out. They clamped down on Vegas in the redzone repeatedly. Vegas committed dumb penalties. They struggled to even get plays off in time a lot for some reason. Ànd so the Bengals get their 1st playoff win since I was in the 6th grade. BILLS 47, PATRIOTS 17 Yeah I'd say the Bills have fully righted themselves. This was as complete a massacre as any playoff game I have ever seen. The Bills scored 7 touchdowns on their first 7 possessions, and it wasn't even like any of those drives were challenging. The Patriots got absolutely smoked. I can't even imagine how joyous it must have been for a Bills fan to watch that game.  Sunday: BUCCANEERS 31, EAGLES 15 Proud to say I didn't watch one solitary second of this horseshit.  49ERS 23, COWBOYS 17 I wouldn't say this ...

The axe came down on Mike Zimmer Monday. And perhaps a bit surprisingly, also on Rick Spielman.  So, the Vikings are officially beginning their biggest overhaul at the top in a decade and a half. I think time will be favorable to both of their tenures here. Both were much better than their detractors will ever want to admit. But both of their skills had slipped noticeably in the last couple years. And the fact is, missing the playoffs in consecutive years, especially when you have this much top end talent, would get just about any coach (and probably any GM) fired. I already see that most annoying subsection of Vikings fans and media trying to craft the narrative that it was signing Kirk Cousins that got these men fired. Nonsense. These firings would have happened SOONER if not for the Kirk signing. Kirk has been one of the only guys on the team to keep them going the last 2 years. No, here is why they were fired.  First with Zimmer. I don't think it can even be questioned tha...

VIKINGS 31 BEARS 17 On the final Sunday of the season, a frustrating, bewildering Vikings season closed out at the purple palace, But more than just a season, this likely marks the conclusion of Mike Zimmer's head coaching career. Even though it's definitely time to move on, this makes me sad. The whole day felt bittersweet. I suppose I've felt sadder at the ends of seasons before, but this was it's own thing. As for this actual game, the first half was just gross. It didn't help that there was little energy in a stadium that has plenty of empty seats. But the Vikings more or less deployed the same offensive gameplan that they used in the earlier Bears game. So that meant they didn't do shit. They had like 22 yards of offense until the Bears had taken a 14-0 lead. Then they decided to actually try, and went right down the field. One final Oli Udoh holding penalty made them settle for a field goal. Second half was way different. The offense was wide open. Kirk hi...

How nice that I can truly do these lists again, after a fractured 2020 that had only a small amount of actual releases post-COVID. 2021 still didn't get back on track movie-wise until the summer. The winter and spring mostly had smaller movies, with few doing much business. Even the year's hits only made a fraction of what they would have made pre-COVID. Well, except for Spiderman. I would hope Spiderman convinces studios of the value of theaters again, after basically 2 years of them trying so hard to push streaming for everything. You need the theater. Not to go all Nicole Kidman on it, but they do make movies better. Maybe it's just a coincidence, but I do feel like the movies I got into most this year were about spectacle. Escapism was in.  My Top 10: 1. Spiderman: No Way Home Yeah, I mean, it's fucking great. It's a great Spiderman movie, a great MCU movie, and it manages to retroactively make all 7 other Spiderman films better.  Can we talk about Tobey and And...

PACKERS 37 VIKINGS 10 I spent 3 hours on Sunday afternoon furiously rooting for the Vikings. Oh, the Vikings weren't actually playing yet. But the Eagles were, at Washington. And we desperately needed a Washington win, to give us life into next week. Washington led most of the game, but gave up the lead in the 4th quarter, and just when it appeared that Taylor Heinicke was about to lead a game winning touchdown drive, he threw a terrible pass to the endzone that was intercepted. With that, the 2021 Vikings fate was sealed. Because we all knew that we had absolutely no chance to win at Lambeau Field on Sunday Night Football. None. And the inevitable has now happened. The 2021 Minnesota Vikings were officially eliminated from playoff contention in a gross, lifeless blowout loss to our most hated rival.  This game was guaranteed to be a loss the moment the news came out on New Year's Eve that Kirk Cousins had tested positive for COVID and would miss the game. Naturally the thing w...