Best/worst movies of 2019

Top 25:

1. Avengers: Endgame

I still think it is a tiny notch down from Infinity War (I will simply never like Fat Thor), but this film is a grand achievement that nails every single big moment. And the portals scene will never not elicit chills. 

2. Booksmart

One of those movies that instantly arrives feeling like a classic you've been watching for years. Beanie Feldstein with one of the performances of the year. 

3. Once Upon A Time In Hollywood

Quentin's most laid back film (and one of his funniest) was another instant classic, with career best performances by DiCaprio and Pitt. 

4. Knives Out

Rian Johnson's brilliantly written and plotted whodunit, with a great cast full of entertaining actors at the top of their game. 

5. Waves

The most emotionally involving film I've seen in a long time. The first half of the film breaks your heart, then the 2nd half puts it back together.

6. Parasite

Bong Joon-Ho's dark satire has more genuine surprises in it than any film this year. And each one makes it that much better. Then it winds up with one of the most haunting endings I've seen. 

7. Jojo Rabbit 

Taika Waititi directs the year's sweetest comedy, which also mixes in heartbreak and lots of big laughs. All while Hitler is a major character.

8. Uncut Gems

I've liked most of Adam Sandler's more serious stuff, but this is his unquestioned peak. And the film is just pure anxiety and tension for 2 hours. 

9. Dolemite Is My Name 

The best movie about making a movie since Ed Wood. The best thing Eddie Murphy has done in decades. 

10. Captain Marvel

Another banner entry in the MCU canon. This one wasn't just a great 90's style action movie, with a badass lead in Brie Larson, it also had the added benefit of being just the right movie to piss off all the worst people. 

11. Hotel Mumbai

A tense as hell docu-thriller about a terrorist attack. The best thing of its kind since United 93.

12. Joker

Joaquin Phoenix gave maybe the best performance of the whole year. The film itself is pretty great too. 

13. Marriage Story

Scarlett Johansson and Adam Driver in peak form, in a film that is sometimes really funny and sometimes hard to watch. 

14. Spiderman: Far From Home

I liked this a little more than Homecoming. Was kind of the perfect film to follow up Endgame. Gyllenhaal was a great Mysterio. 

15. The Art of Self Defense

Great dark comedy, with the best role in years for Jesse Eisenberg. Perfect ending too.

16. Good Boys

In terms of just pure laughs, nothing got me more this year. 

17. The Irishman

Scorsese back in his wheelhouse. Best work in years from Deniro and Pacino, and was great to have Joe Pesci back. 

18. Cold Pursuit

Was like the Coen Brothers decided to make one of those Liam Neeson tough guy movies. 

19. Ford v Ferrari

Great old fashioned big star filmmaking. 

20. Midsommar

I did not vibe at all with the same director's Hereditary. This one I definitely did vibe with. Probably didn't hurt that it started the amazing Florence Pugh.

21. Honey Boy

Could have been self-indulgent tripe. Instead it was nostalgic and cathartic, and Noah Jupe gave one of the best performances ever by a child actor. 

22. Us

Jordan Peele's Get Out follow up was more of a straightforward horror film, but similarly sharp. Lupita Nyong'o was brilliant. 

23. Ad Astra

Really smart, quiet sci-fi. Pitt had a great year. 

24. John Wick Chapter 3

Probably my least favorite of the 3, but it's still the go-to franchise for R-rated action right now. 

25. Toy Story 4

It was certainly good enough to justify its existence, and the ending certainly got me, but let's not tempt fate again. 

Honorable mentions: Long Shot, Rocketman, Ma, Terminator: Dark Fate, Doctor Sleep, Luce, Ready Or Not, Gloria Bell, Glass, Lucy In The Sky, Brittany Runs A Marathon, Blinded By The Light, Little Women, and yes, The Rise of Skywalker.

Bottom Ten:

10. It: Chapter 2

God what a slog to get through.

9. Dumbo

The nadir of this era of live action Disney remakes. 

8. The Dead Don't Die

Jim Jarmusch assembled a great cast for this zombie comedy, then forgot to add ANY humor at all. 

7. Countdown

A monumentally dopey horror movie about an app that kills you. 

6. The Fanatic

This John Travolta starrer directed by Fred Durst is.already quite notorious in its awfulness. But...it's kind of entertainingly awful.

5. Jexi

So, take Her, and twist it into a braindead comedy that has no laughs. Oh, and cast Adam Devine, cause yeah, he's real appealing. 🙄

4. Undercover Brother 2

Yes, this exists. No, it didn't play in any theaters. I did not laugh once. 

3. Murder Mystery

Before Uncut Gems, Adam Sandler (with Jennifer Aniston in her latest garbage movie too) gave us hopefully his last lazy piece of shit Netflix movie. 

2. Cats

I knew this would be awful, but I was hoping for something entertainingly terrible(like The Fanatic). Nope. This gives you all the awfulness, and bores you to death. And it stops dead in the middle so Taylor Swift can come out and do a song that doesn't even exist in the play. Karma. 

1. Black Christmas 

But as bad as Cats is, at least it isn't this rephrehensible trash. A horribly shot, acted and written horror remake that on top of all its technical incompetence carries a message that deep down all men are rapists. Go fuck yourself, Black Christmas.

Dishonorable mentions: Pokemon: Detective Pikachu, The Hustle, Rambo: Last Blood, Richard Jewell, The Addams Family, The Secret Life of Pets 2, Stuber, and the most disappointing film of the year, Godzilla: King of the Monsters.