Morbius is a complete piece of shit

Oh Sony.

Sony Sony Sony.

Sony is coming off one of the great successes ever with Spiderman: No Way Home, a record setting hit that also happened to be a legitimately sensational movie.

And after watching Morbius, more than ever we now know that the fact that this latest trilogy of Spiderman flicks worked is in spite of Sony. 

Because you remove the help of Kevin Feige and the Disney/Marvel team, and you get a couple deeply mediocre Venom movies (that, yes, a lot of people did like) and now a movie that is unquestionably the worst movie to ever have ties to the MCU, and one of the worst movies in its genre of all time. 

Yes, Morbius is fucking garbage. And that's just the movie that precedes a pair of post credits scenes that made me viscerally angry. 

I figured that if anything was going to make this a bad movie it would be having Jared Leto play the title character. Leto is an annoying person and an actor prone to really irritating performances. But here he's too dull to be grating. 

Long story short on the plot has Morbius being a doctor suffering from a blood disease, who uses vampire bats to create a cure....which naturally turns him into a vampire. So he has to figure out a way to control his thirst for blood (a la Blade) while also having to avoid the cops who think he is a murderer, and also stop his childhood friend Lucien (Matt Smith, the only actor in this who shows any life) who also has the same disease and also took the cure somehow, but who wants to be a bad guy.

Lucien's villainy makes little sense, but at least Smith provides some hammy acting. Adria Arjona plays Morbius's fellow doctor and...love interest? I mean, they kiss randomly at one point, so I guess. Tyrese Gibson for some reason was cast as one of the detectives trying to nab Morbius, but it is a nothing part. A couple other recognizable faces pop up for nothing roles. 

This movie was heavily delayed. The first trailer hit before COVID, and this was absolutely set to open well before No Way Home. Early trailers showed a lot of stuff that is not in the movie, including references to Spiderman and Venom, so this thing was obviously hacked up. You can tell. The pacing sucks, numerous things happen for no reason, even Morbius's powers are unclear most of the time. And the movie naturally ends in a very unsatisfying fashion. 

It's just a thorough bore, one of the most boring movies of its type ever. But then come the post credits scenes, which had me embarrassed for the way it taints the Marvel name. 

They both include Michael Keaton's Vulture. First we see that rip in the multiverse from  NWH and Keaton being transported into the Morbius universe. Then we see him in full Vulture gear meeting up with Morbius and, without saying it, basically suggests starting up the Sinister Six and fighting Spiderman. WHAT???? Why is Vulture sent to another universe at all? How does he have a full Vulture suit then? Why would Morbius have any interest in fighting Spiderman? What a clusterfuck. It shits on everything they did with Vulture in Homecoming. It doesn't even vibe with the Morbius character as presented here. It doesn't fit with the rules of Strange's spell at the end of NWH. Who signed off on this bullshit?

It speaks to a collective idiocy and sloppiness at Sony that is embarrassing. Kevin Feige should refuse any more collaborations until he and the Disney/Marvel team get creative control over ALL Sony's Marvel characters. Cause it is clear that without his help they will fuck up the future Spiderman movies. People know that "Marvel Studios" is way more important than "in association with Marvel."