NFL Week 18 recap

Saturday:

[Chiefs 31, Raiders 13]

Chiefs easily dispatched the Raiders and clinched the AFC's #1 seed...although they are not guaranteed a home AFC title game cause the NFL botched their response to the postponed Bills-Bengals game. 

[Jaguars 20, Titans 16]

This was actually a good game. I expected the Jags to roll, but the Titans showed a lot of grit and Joshua Dobbs actually made some plays. Trevor Lawrence actually was not good at all. But the Titans made the one key mistake late with the strip sack fumble and that's all it took. So the Jaguars go from 3-7 to division champs, while the Titans lose their last 7 games in one of the all time collapses. 

Sunday:

[Bills 35, Patriots 23]

[Dolphins 11, Jets 6]

[Steelers 28, Browns 14]

The early window headliner was deciding the AFC's final wild card. You knew Buffalo was going to be nearly impossible to beat. The Patriots actually made it a game, but you're not winning when you allow two kick return TDs. Buffalo locked up the 2 seed. 

The Pats loss.opened the door for Miami, who had Skylar Thompson at QB but still did just enough to eek out a win with a late field goal. It's a waste of a playoff spot if Miami doesn't at least have Teddy next week.

The odd team out was Pittsburgh, who I wanted in. Still, Mike Tomlin once again avoided a losing season, and they went 7-2 to finish the season. 

First time since 2000 that neither the Patriots or Steelers made the playoffs. 

[Bengals 27, Ravens 16]

The Bengals clinched the north when the Buffalo game.got canceled. This win clinched home field against the Ravens next week. It would have been a coin flip to decide it otherwise. 

[Texans 32, Colts 31]

The Texans hit a pair of 4th downs, including a 4th and 20 TD, plus a 2, to win in the last minute. It cost the Texans the #1 pick but good for them. Tanking is for losers. Hell of an interim run for Jeff Saturday. 

[Falcons 30, Buccaneers 17]

[Panthers 10, Saints 7]

The pathetic NFC South was laid to rest. The check down king played long enough to break his own completions record. Laughable. I'm surprised the NFL actually allowed a Brady team to have a losing record. These results made Tampa 8-9 and everyone else 7-10. Brady's luck is endless. 

[Broncos 31, Chargers 28]

The Chargers did what I feared the Vikings would. They.played starters way into a meaningless game, and may have lost Mike Williams. And lost the game anyway. Denver finished a disaster of a season on a high note. 

[Eagles 22, Giants 16]

[Commanders 26, Cowboys 6]

Once we knew that Jalen Hurts was back and the Giants were sitting starters this result was easy to guess, although the Eagles were not dominant. The Eagles clinched the east and the #1 seed. Dallas went in having a lot to play for but laid a major egg. I really hope Dallas simply saved all the good plays for next week. We need you! 

[49ers 38, Cardinals 13]

The lock of the week, although Arizona did make a game of it early, before the 49ers ran off the last 24 points of the game. The 49ers clinched the 2 seed. JJ Watt's career ended, as did Arizona's trainwreck of a season. 

[Seahawks 19, Rams 16 OT]

You knew that since this outcome affected the Packers that the refs would be involved. Sure enough, a handful of big calls late came in to help Seattle. A doink sent the game to OT but then a terrible Baker Mayfield pick set up Seattle for the win.

[Lions 20, Packers 16]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

And Seattle gets in, because Aaron Rodgers couldn't even beat an eliminated Lions team on his home field, even with a smattering of Lambeau refs. Major credit to the Lions for playing straight up. The Packers proved themselves to be.a bunch of classless, dirty pieces of shit (shoving a trainer? Really?), led by Chief Asshole Rodgers. How delicious that his last pass was an amateurish interception that loathed the game. Will he retire? No, he doesn't have the kind of honor or humility to just walk away. He will either force his way back to the Packers or maybe some stupid team will trade for him. No matter. The Packers are DONE. No playoffs. Good riddance, assholes!!!!