THE EVERGREEN TEASE

BENGALS 27

VIKINGS 24 OT

Yeah I don't think I can do this anymore.

I've tried to maintain a positive, optimistic outlook throughout this 2023 season from hell that the Vikings (and Vikings fans) have endured. Call it defiance, delusion, or whatever. I have refused to give up.

Well I give up. The 2023 season from hell is never going to stop torturing us. Torturing us with bad luck. Torturing us with the tease of what this season could have and should have been.

Never was this more clear than on Saturday afternoon, where the Vikings controlled most of the game against the Bengals, only to implode so thoroughly that this feels like the moment the season became unsaveable.

The Vikings started Nick Mullens, their record 4th starting QB on the season, and the early returns were good. He led a touchdown drive right away, a score by Ty Chandler (starting for the injured Alexander Mattison).

The Vikings defense let Jake Browning lead an opening field goal drive, but otherwise was shutting that Bengals offense down in the first half. We were in control of this game very early. Yet at halftime it was just a 7-3 lead. 

Why? Why do you think? The Vikings entire season has been plagued by turnovers, and today was no different. A likely scoring drive ended when Mullens threw a horrible interception at the goal line. Then Mullens threw a ghastly pick right into the hands of a defender as he was being sacked well within field goal range. That's a minimum of 6 points pissed away.

After halftime though, Mullens came out firing. He led a 92 yard drive, which ended in a dazzling play where Mullens threw, while being hit, and Jordan Addison made a shoe top catch and run for a touchdown.

When Akayleb Evans picked off Browning the next series, all the momentum was on our side. We tacked on a field goal, and with the 4th quarter approaching things looked good. 

But that's the thing about this season from hell. It isn't ALWAYS hell. It teases you with hope, with the promise of what could be but never is.

Take the defense. Brian Flores has whipped that unit into shape, into an asset. They just pitched a shutout last week. Into the 4th today they had the longest streak in the NFL this season of not allowing a touchdown. 

But in the season from hell, the great stories turn tragic (ask Josh Dobbs). And this defense had a stunning implosion in Cincinnati, the likes of which I haven't seen since Drew Bledsoe torched Tony Dungy's defense up in Foxboro in 1994. 

First, after the field goal, they let the Bengals zip down the field for 75 yards in 8 plays, and a touchdown on the 1st play of the 4th. 

Naturally our offense went 3 and out. 

Naturally the defense failed again, allowing a grotesque wide open 3rd and 21 conversion after a grounding call, and then a 4th and goal TD. Cause we had to have the tease of stopping them.

The next Vikings drive had a little of everything. Mullens threw what looked like a pick six, but an obvious Bengals offsides nullified that. Unfazed, Mullens led the Vikings down the field. Chandler broke off a big run to the 1. Then Mullens made a crazy risky across the body throw that somehow was caught by Addison. The Vikings led 24-17. 

But you have to have that tease of responding to a blown lead with a clutch drive, the hope that maybe we will still escape. And the Vikings defense had checked out. They let Browning and company go right down the field again, a drive culminating in a jump ball that should have been picked (shades of Denver) but instead wound up an acrobatic Tee Higgins touchdown. The number of interceptions that we haven't come down with this year in these spots...

It was off to overtime. We lost the toss and you figured that was it. But no, again, that's too easy. Have to tease the hope. So the Vikings defense got a big sack and broke up a deep ball to force a punt.

Mullens immediately hit Hockenson to get to midfield, then again to get into short yardage. We were probably just a first down away from starting to think game winning field goal.

But that 1st down never came. On 3rd and 1, Mullens tried a QB sneak (a bit of a tush push) but went more sideways than forward. Then on 4th and 1 we ran the same play, and Mullens stumbled as soon as he took the snap and was again stopped. With the game on the line, we can't gain ONE GOD DAMN YARD IN TWO TRIES! It didn't help we had spindly Brandon Powell behind Mullens doing the push. 

So that was the game. Oh, but no, even THIS situation had to tease hope. So we got Cincy into 3rd and long. Pressure flushed Browning, who then fired downfield, just between two guys, to Tyler Boyd, who we not only let catch the ball but run an extra 15 yards or so to make the field goal a guarantee. A couple plays later the teases of hope were gone and we lost. 

I can't do this anymore. The 2023 season is the most painful Vikings season of any I have seen since 1987. Not the worst team, but by far the worst collection of painful "what ifs" we have ever seen. 

I cannot be hopeful anymore. This loss, which I predicted, does not knock the Vikings out of a playoff spot. It did rob a chance to maybe play for 1st place on Christmas Eve. It feels like all they have done for a month is hand back chances to win the north again.

It's insane the losses this team has suffered this year. All 7 by a score. Losing the turnover battle week after week. Missing out on countless bounces. We drop passes, they never do. Unluckiest team.in the NFL this year and it isn't close.

You would think this would have run its course by now, but here we are still suffering in week 15. The season from hell is not going to let us out of this misery. Ever. Oh, but it will tease. You can bet the playoff hopes will survive into week 18, maybe even into the final quarter. 

Only then will this pain finally end, with a Vikings team that could have contended for a super bowl sitting on the outside of the playoffs.